Top Ten Idiosyncrasies of the Big Brothers

Top Ten Idiosyncrasies of the Big Brothers

ONE: Owen's fear of the beeping coffee maker, which causes him to hide on the stoop in the carport every morning, hands over ears, until the coffee has finished brewing.

TWO: Mitch's love affair with Dee Dee, which is not his name for his favorite blanket, but his name for the TAG on his favorite blanket, which Owen accidentally tore off yesterday and about which Mitch bawled until it was sewed back on.

THREE: Mitch's love of shoes, and his belief that putting on a pair of shoes means one is "going to work."

FOUR: Owen's obsession with "driving home a different way" and taking new exits off the Beltline.

FIVE: Mitch's use of the word "soaking" in place of the word "very," as in, "I'm soaking tired" or "I'm soaking dirty."

SIX: Both boys' insistence on yelling hello to anyone who walks by our house, regardless of the person's appearance (remember, we live very close to downtown), and their persistence if said person does not respond immediately. They continue calling hello until he does answer, causing John and I to hide behind the van and hiss at them to stop it before we get mugged.

SEVEN: Mitch's embarrassing tendency to ask complete strangers for their keys and/or cellphones.

EIGHT: Mitch's recitation of the ABC's, which includes, "H, I, K, K and a little P."

NINE: Owen's talents as an emcee/sports announcer/commercial voice over-er. He does play-by-play for our driveway games of baseball, hockey, and basketball, and both boys play "infomercial" in the sandbox, using buckets and shovels as the products they are demonstrating.

TEN: For both, favorite snack = two pieces of plain bread. Wouldja like some water with that?